Effective Communication

By: Iriawan Hartana

Komunikasi (in Indonesian) is derived from English word “communication”, as an etymology or based on its root language from Latin word ‘communicates’, and this word is rooted from the word ‘communis’. Communis means ‘sharing’ or ‘belong together’ is an effort to achieve the same goal. Communication is a process of delivering a message from one party to another party to influence each other. In general, communication is done using words that can be understood by each party. With communication, a person’s action or intent can be understood by others. Communication, in terminological, refers to a process of delivering a message from one party to another party. So, based on this definition, the one who is involved in this communication is human.


According to Ruben and Steward, human communication is a process which involved individuals in a relationship, group, organization, and society that responds and creates a message to adapt within their surroundings. As a social creature, human always wants to connect with each other. He is eager to know about his surroundings, and anything happens within his surroundings. This curiosity pushes human to communicate with each other. Followed by the growing of personal communication theories, of course it will bring a lot of impact in how people communicate within their society nowadays. In the society, a person who never communicates with others will get isolated. The effect of this isolation will create a mental depression and in the end he can loses his mental balance. Communication is an eternal part in human life, the same like breathing. As long as a human lives, he has to communicate with others.

Communication process happens between interpersonal; happens between two people or involves some people in a certain time in order to achieve the same goal. Time-spent to communicate, either in numbers or intensities can create a bond called relationship. In English-Indonesian dictionary, it is mentioned that a relationship is a relation or a bond. Relationship also means a relation or an interaction between two people or more, consciously and involves perception that they have each other.


Some assumptions about relationship in interpersonal communication, such as:

  1. The bond always relates with communication and cannot be separated
  2. The character of the bond is determined by communication happens between every participant
  3. The bond usually defines in implicit way and less explicit
  4. The bond will evolve in time through a negotiation process between every participant
  5. The bond is dynamic

Communication is very potential in running instrumental function as a tool to influence and persuade others. We can use our five senses to sharpen our persuading skills when we communicate with our communicant. Communication can be done by face-to-face and we can use other methods of face-to-face communication to make our communicants more intimate, it is different with mass media communication such as newspaper, television, or using other high-technology communication.

Effective communication happens if a meeting between every stakeholder builds in a fun and interactive communication situation. Effective communication is really determined by information validity that is delivered and involvement in idea formulating together. If you join a group with the same view, it will make you happy, joy, and comfortable. On the contrary, if you join a group that you have, it will make you nervous, restless, and unpleasant.


Some of the advices in maintaining a relationship, so it can be well-preserved:

  1. Be kind; in an interpersonal relationship, a person has to be kind, polite, and delightful, to occur a comfortable feeling in maintaining a relationship. An arrogant, egoistic, and temperamental behavior is better to be avoided whenever possible, because it will make people uncomfortable and feeling annoyed.
  2. Communicate as often as possible; a good communication is really important in maintaining a harmony within a relationship. It is better if you communicate as often as possible, even in a simple way, such as greetings. This is a way to maintain the relationship. Speak the truth, openness, and share feelings also respond a conflict in a good way is also included in a communication to maintain the relationship.
  3. Openness; this attitude is needed to make sure that is nothing hidden within the relationship. Things that are hidden can trigger a conflict in the future. If there is any hard feeling, it is better to speak in a proper way, either in a discussion or become a good listener. Openness can be done by telling what you feel, being a good listener, giving an appropriate advice or giving empathy to others.
  4. Giving guarantee; guarantee in a relationship is important. For example, if we are good at keeping a secret, people will trust us their secrets. The guarantee that we give can also in a form of comfort and safety.
  5. Doing an activity together; doing an activity together can tighten up the relationship. For example, shopping, taking a walk, or simply by having a meal together. Even it is not possible to be done, listening their stories and activities can also become other alternative.
  6. Think positive; interpersonal relationship actually is not any different with other relations. To have a harmonious relationship, people who are involved must always try to create a nice interaction and think positively. Whenever possible, never create news or actions that can lead to negative issues or arguments.
  7. Upgrading self-competency; continuously improve to make other people who interact with us become more comfortable is a right action needed in having a relationship. For example, dressed in an appropriate and a good way.